Total Medals Earned: 21 (From 7 different games.) Total Medal Score: 510 Points
Medals Earned: 1/6 (5/240 points)
Learn all about everything by opening the field journal!
Find 3 "golden orb" rooms
Defeat Bob the Balrog (floor 4-3)
Trade three tier III items at the witch's shop
Earn all 5 totems
Defeat the Dragon (floor 8-3)
Medals Earned: 1/11 (25/500 points)
Unlock this medal to learn its secrets!
destroy 10 boulders in a single Rage
Collect all 10 gems in a single run
use every antitode orb to recover from poisoning in a single run
Collect all health orbs in a single run
Collect all rage orbs in a single run
survive for 3 minutes
Destroy 20 boulders in a single Rage
Reach the bottom of the Giant Pit
Medals Earned: 1/4 (5/180 points)
Look at the credits
Get peak horniness
Pace yourself well enough to get a score of 10,000 or greater.
See your name in the Hall Of Shame
Medals Earned: 9/12 (220/250 points)
Complete the tutorial
Try to go back into your mom's room right away
Fast-travel from one end of the map to the other
Collect $1.01
Beat the game
Ask for a hint about the omelette
Learn a thing or two about stereotypes
Medals Earned: 2/11 (55/395 points)
Liar, liar...you get where this is going.
And you should be damn proud.
Please tell me you were just trying to get this medal.
You monster.
What you should have done is really obvious.
You found a stalker!
Good luck with your new career.
Sure, it's just a video game, but also, you killed someone.
You're going to be such a good zookeeper.
...
I hope you chose the money.
Medals Earned: 3/20 (15/500 points)
Get skewered on spikes
Launch the Turtle
Smash a goomba
Launch 1 mile (5,280ft)
Find the hidden button
Launch 5 miles (26,400ft)
Blow up a jeep
Crush an angry ground creature
Reach space
Get punched by a banana
Get caught by a UFO
Get burned by a sun
Play over an hour
Launch 10 miles (52,800ft)
Use a nuke
Play over 2 hours
Buy everything
Launch 25 miles (132,000ft)
Total over 1 million feet
Launch 50 miles (264,000ft)
Medals Earned: 4/6 (185/310 points)
You were literally roasted.
Secret handshakes are such a bummer.
Well, that was disgusting.
You are officially a cannibal.
Put some clothes on. No one wants to see that.
Please give me money. Please.